


We Found Love

by puskababy



Category: Adam Lambert (Musician), Kris Allen (Musician)
Genre: Gay Sex, Language, M/M, POV First Person, Poverty
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-16
Updated: 2013-04-16
Packaged: 2017-12-08 15:57:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 20,133
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/763232
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/puskababy/pseuds/puskababy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rock star Adam Lambert needs a break. Lane once mentioned a volunteer group she worked with in the past, and told him how rewarding it was. Adam remembers that when he's thinking of places to hide and recharge his batteries, so he has Lane sign him up. </p><p>Adam wonders if he's gotten more than he'd bargained for - Haiti is hotter than he'd imagined (his make-up melts off his face) and he'd take a shower twice a day if his tent (or the camp it was in) had running water, but then Adam meets the man in charge of the group of volunteers he's a part of. </p><p>Kris is no stranger to helping others, he's been on several mission trips since starting college. This time though Kris needed to get away so he could think: it's time to decide whether he wants to keep on playing music in bars and producing his own records that sell 10 copies, or if he wants to get married and settle down. </p><p>Kris thinks there's only one path to follow: the same path his father took. He'd given his music a chance, now it was time to be an adult and grow up. But then Adam Lambert shows up in his little group of volunteers, and shows Kris that there's another path. Will Kris be brave enough to walk the path that leads to happiness in Adam's arms?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. 1

You know how time crawls by when you’re looking at the clock? That endless frustration when you realise it’s only been 5 minutes since you last looked at it? Well that’s exactly how I feel right now. The slowness of the clock makes me want to rip my hair out, (I would, but it’s just been dyed, so it would be a waste of 200 bucks, plus I don’t look good bald). 

“Adam are you listening?”

No, I immediately think, but then feel bad. I know I should be listening to this, this is after all something I need to know: but I just can’t focus right now. There’s a fly buzzing around the window, the halogen light is making my eyes hurt and I think I feel a migraine coming on. Forcing my face to remain unchanged, I glance up, trying to focus again on what my manager was saying. 

Yep, definitely a migraine coming on, I think, feeling the telltale spots of colour dance in front of my eyes and my the usual stomach churn. They make it hard to read what’s on the paper in front of me and I reach for the glass of water in front of me, gulping down the cool liquid quickly, hoping it will somehow settle my upset stomach. 

“Adam?”

“Yes I’m listening”

Ryan, my manager looks annoyed, but continues what he was saying, outlining information about an upcoming appearance on the Jimmy Kimmel show that I’m to tape next week. I’m excited about it, really, but then my stomach rolls again and I have to fight back the vomit that burns up my throat, clapping a hand over my mouth. 

“Are you ok?”

I nod and lurch to my feet as another, stronger wave of nausea rockets through me, shoving my chair back as I bolt from the room. Thank God there’s a restroom in the next room over, and I make it to the toilet just in time to lose my lunch. 

Fabulous, I think, once the dry heaves have stopped. Swallowing thickly, I rest my head on the cool tiled wall, wiping my watering eyes. I hate being sick, it would have to be the worst feeling in the world. Thankfully though it doesn’t last for long, for which I’m grateful. After a moment I hear another set of footsteps in the room. 

“Adam?” Lane’s voice is careful: she knows I sometimes turn into a grouch when I’m sick. 

“In here” I bang once on the door and see her black pumps appear under it. 

“You good? You need anything?”

I stood up slowly, still feeling vaguely sick. “No I’m ok, is anyone pissed? Did I miss anything?”

Lane smiled when I swung the door open and I’m grateful because I know I look like crap. 

“I told them you need the rest of the day off”

“I love you” I sighed, crossing to the sink to splash water on my face. 

“You want me to drive you home? I’m not sure you should be driving”

“No I think I’m ok”

Lane frowns, and I can sense her protest before she even opens her mouth. 

“Adam can I suggest something?”

“What?” I asked warily, already knowing the answer. 

“You need to take a break, have a couple of weeks off or something, go on a vacation I don’t know. You’re running yourself into the ground”

Sighing I nod, admitting to myself that she maybe has a point. While I love what I do, it’s an exhausting career, and I know I sometimes work too hard, wanting to live up to the hype that can sometimes threaten to overtake me. Ever since Idol I’ve felt that I have to make up for something, the fans got me to where I am today, and now I need to reciprocate and give them all I can. 

“Will you think about it?”

“Yes I will. Thank you Laney”

She smiled and kissed my cheek. “It’s not a problem hon, just look after yourself. You have my number if you need anything”

“Yep”

The halls are quiet as I head down to the underground parking lot, and I slip my sunglasses on to ward off the glare, not wanting to intensify the oncoming migraine. The busy LA traffic is enough to make my head resume it’s pounding, and I hurry to the car, sighing in relief when the door thuds behind me. 

I know I probably shouldn’t be driving with a migraine, but I make it through the streets to home, slipping behind the security gate and heading inside, pressing a button on the wall that brings the blinds down, plunging the house into blessed darkness. Like it always is, it’s quiet here and I sometimes feel like I’m rattling around in the large space, but I don’t mind being alone, really I don’t. 

My bedroom is a quiet haven, and I sink down onto the King size mattress, moaning loudly as I kick off my boots and reach for my belt, sliding the tight denim off and wriggling out of my clothes till I’m naked on the sheets. The air-con kicks in, and the cool air feels sweet on my heated skin. Sighing, I sink deeper into the bed and close my eyes, letting my mind wander. 

It takes a while for my mind to clear, and I’m almost asleep when the thought hits me. I vaguely remember Lane mentioning something about some volunteer work she did in Haiti after the earthquake hit in 2010, she said it was the most rewarding experience she’d ever had, and had urged me to do something similar if I ever got the chance. She’d only mentioned it to me because I’d mentioned my work with the various charities I support. 

Maybe something like that would be the perfect way to recharge my batteries, and instead of simply sitting here on my ass, I could be doing something for the planet – not to mention the people. Yeah I think as I feel myself drifting into that lovely floaty feeling that comes just before sleep, maybe I’ll do something like that.

***

My migraine is all but disappeared the next morning, and I’m able to keep down my breakfast, which is awesome. My head still thumps occasionally, but I’m feeling pretty good as I sit on the deck and check my e-mails, feeling the sun warm my skin and hoping I don’t freckle even more.

It’s about 11 by the time I finally make up my mind to call Lane and ask about her trip to Haiti. She answers on the second ring. 

“You feeling better?”

“Yes, much thanks. Hey I have something to ask you”

“What’s up? I hope it’s about what I mentioned yesterday”

I nod, even though she can’t see it. “It is actually. I was wondering what the name of that charity group you worked for in Haiti was? You know, the one you worked for after the earthquake, a couple of years ago?”

Lane is quiet for a moment, and I can practically hear the cogs turning in her mind. She’s always been pretty quick to guess what’s on my mind, something that comes from years of knowing each other. 

“It was called United Living, they worked on restoring the infrastructure after the quake. The manager is Dave Lamont. What are you thinking about Adam?”

“Well, we both know that I don’t particularly do well with nothing to do, and I know that I need to take a break. I remembered you saying you loved it, and I thought it would be the perfect thing for me to do. I could just go on my own, quietly, and hopefully stay out of the limelight for a while. This is just what I need”

“Sounds like you’ve got it all worked out”

“I do, the more I think about it, the more I want to do it. Can you set it up for me please?”

“Of course” Lane answers immediately, and I can hear papers rustling as she gets herself organised. 

“Thank you”

“You’ll need to get injections, I think your current ones were too long ago. Leave it with me hon and I’ll get it all sorted and get back to you. In the meantime I want you to relax”

“I will. Thanks so much for helping me out with this”: I said, leaning back on my chair as I feel the sun get just a little bit too hot. 

“Ok, Give me a couple of days and I’ll have it sorted” Lane said, before hanging up. 

I sat back in my chair, placing the phone on the table, a huge grin on my face. Finally I felt like I was doing something right, like I was back on my way carving my path through the world. It felt right, and I realised then just how out of sorts I’d been with everything recently. Trespassing was going well, better than I expected actually, and I still had a few months before I needed to begin rehearsals for my second tour. I needed to be on top of my game for that, and this upcoming trip to Haiti sounded like the perfect way to get me back on track.


	2. 2

One month later I was on my way to Haiti. I’d had all my injections, (hopefully) immunising me from typhoid, dengue fever, tetanus, rabies and a whole lot of other diseases I can’t even remember. Thanks to my Doctor, I was currently taking a course of anti-Malaria drugs to hopefully prevent me from getting the disease. Of course the best way to not get it, was to avoid mosquitoes, but since the climate over there is pretty tropical, I figure at some point on my trip I’m bound to come across them. 

The pockets in my bag were packed with iodine tablets and bottled water, and I’d been sent a packet of documents from Dave Lamont that detailed all sorts of items that I needed to know and be aware of, like not eating food off the street vendors, and changing my travel routes to avoid getting kidnapped. Lane had set up a personal bodyguard for me, a big burly guy called Jerry who was to accompany me everywhere I went, which was fine by me, as now that the trip was actually happening – I felt more than a little nervous. 

My mother hadn’t really been pleased with my choice of destination: she worried way too much about me sometimes. I told her, as I’d told her a thousand times before, that I was a 30 year old man, who was more than capable of taking care of himself. She still didn’t approve, but I think the fact that I was so excited about it made her stop complaining. 

“Now when you get there, Dave is going to be waiting at the airport in Port-au-Prince ok? He’s a tall, skinny blonde and he’s usually got a beanie on despite the fact that it’s boiling over there. He’s going to have a card with your alias on it so he should be easy to find. Remember don’t talk to anyone, don’t let anyone take you from the airport, don’t…just don’t do anything till Dave finds you ok?” Lane said as we waited at the airport in LA. 

“I know, you’ve told me this before”

She sighed. “I know that, it’s just, this is a pretty unstable country to go to Adam. It’s gotten ten times worse since the Earthquake. I want you to be careful. I don’t want anything happening to you”

I gave her shoulder a quick squeeze. “I know. I’ve read up on all the travel guides, and the CDC website about all the diseases. I’ll be careful I promise”

“Ok, God I wish I was going with you”

“Lane I’ll be fine. I’ve got Jerry with me, and I’m sure the people at United Living aren’t surviving in paper boxes. It’s going to be ok”

She nodded, but still looked uneasy, and as my flight number was called she stood up, quickly giving me a tight hug. Surprised, it took me a minute to respond before I hugged her back. 

“Thanks for doing this for me Laney” I whispered in her ear. 

“It’s not a problem. You be safe now” she said firmly as she released me.

“I will”

She waved once before turning away, her steps swift as she made her exit before she could show any emotion. I smiled ruefully as I took my seat on the plane: that was my Laney, she had a heart of gold under that tough exterior. 

The flight to the Caribbean wasn’t too long, and before I knew it I was stepping from the plane into the hot, sticky heat of the Port-au-Prince airport. It was busy and noisy, packed with travellers going their separate ways, and I didn’t immediately know where to go. 

“Hey, bonjour, would you like to go to the centre of town?” A short dark haired man was tugging on my sleeve, his words thickly accented. He pulled me quickly away from the main throng of people, and I felt my unease grow. This was exactly the sort of shit that I’d been told to avoid.

“No, no thank you” I muttered, pulling my arm back just as Jerry stepped in, pushing his bulk in between us both, thus cutting off the other man’s grip. 

“Let’s go this way, get back to where your guy’s waiting” he said, slipping his arm around me and steering me back to the main crowd. 

Thankfully a tall, blonde man stepped up, a white card bearing my alias – Johnson Dane - held in front of him. 

“Hi John” he said brightly, but low enough so as not to draw attention to us. 

“You must be Boris” I said, following the silly secret name thing that Lane had set up. Dave knew my real name of course: this was just her way of making sure we were safe. 

He grinned, showing off impeccable white teeth. “Sure am. Come on, the car is this way”

Dave led us through the crowded airport, slipping through the crowd like a fish in water, while I floundered beside him, being bumped and shuffled from side to side. Following the guidelines I’d been given, I didn’t have anything valuable in my pockets, but that didn’t stop me from freaking out a bit. Well, freaking out would be a mild way to put it. I was fucking shitting myself. 

“Ok, we have a spread out of the main precinct – it’s pretty rough but it’s home to all the volunteers, and to our food and living services. It’s not much, but you can guarantee that the food and water inside the boundary is safe to consume, when we can get it of course” Dave was explaining as we made out way out to his car – a beat up Toyota that was covered in mud. 

“It’s cyclone season too, so you need to be prepared for that. They occasionally made landfall, we had one just the other week, so I’d say we are due for another one. Don’t stress too much about it, we’re got facilities in place at the camp to protect us. I’ve set you up with a small group of people who are currently working on re-establishing the infrastructure here, mainly schools and housing, sometimes small buildings for farmers. It’s hard work, tough manual labour, but the guy in charge of your unit is pretty cool. I’ll take you to meet him this afternoon, once we get there and get you settled a bit”

I swallowed hard as Dave rattled off various other things I would need to know about my work with United Living. Crap, this was going to be tougher than I realised, but I was prepared for hard work, in fact I relished the thought of it, if only his comment about the food and water didn’t worry me so much. I was boiling already, instantly wanting the cool rush of running water, but apparently that was hard to come by, at least in the camp we were heading to. 

For the first time since arriving here, I started to think I’d gotten in over my head.

***

It turns out that Dave wasn’t exaggerating when he said the camp was rough. There was a collection of tents arranged in small groups, about half a dozen set up just as we came into the camp. The ground was muddy with large puddles and debris lying everywhere, and I was glad I’d brought decent footwear, thinking of the potential fungal infections that could be lurking there.

“There’s a spare bed in that tent right over there, you’ll be in with Kris, that’s the guy in charge and a couple of others. We’re down on numbers actually so your help is going to mean a lot. I’m assuming Jerry here will be staying for the entirety of your time here?”

“Yeah he will” I said, swallowing past the tightness in my throat. _Get a grip Adam: this will be good for you._

“Ok then, he’ll be in that tent over there, there’s simply not enough room in your tent for him to be there too” Dave said, sensing Jerry’s objection. 

“It’s cool Jer, we’re right next to each other” I said, following Dave as he pushed the flap open of the tent I was to call home for the next couple of weeks. It smelled vaguely of sweat, and that weird smell that comes from too many people living too closely together. 

“Here’s your bed, you can just store your stuff underneath it, but make sure it’s all sealed up, we tend to get some night crawlers that might think your bag would make a nice home”

Eeep. If that was the case, then I’d be fucking sleeping with my bag in the bed. My expression must have been funny because Dave laughed. 

“Relax Adam, it’ll be fine. It’s pretty safe here, we’re all together and we haven’t had many problems from the locals or any of the gangs that can trouble aid workers. Remember to stay out of the city at night though, and you should be fine. Come on, let’s go meet some of the others,” he said, thumping my shoulder and making me stumble slightly. 

After dumping my stuff on my bed I followed him through the camp to where a small kitchenette was set up in another much larger tent, a silver tarp keeping out the elements. I noticed all the food was being kept in a small fridge. 

“Yeah we have electricity, but sometimes it can short out. When that happens one of us has to go into Port-au-Prince to get more supplies. We restocked yesterday, so we should be pretty set. Hey Kev! This is our newest worker,” he said, thumping my back again. 

Kevin was short and portly, with balding hair and a van Dyke beard. He shook my hand, nearly crushing my fingers in his strong grip. 

“Nice to meet you”

He wandered off after that, and I watched what looked like lunch being passed out amongst the small group by a short brown haired guy wearing khaki pants and a white shirt. Dave caught his attention and as he came closer I realised he was quite attractive. 

“This is the man of the hour, our man in charge. Kris Allen, meet Adam” Dave said, introducing us. 

Kris grinned and shook my hand, and I tried to ignore the tingle in my palm when his warm hand enveloped my own. _Not the time for a crush Adam._

“I know who you are. So what brings a star like you out here?” he said conversationally. 

“I thought I could be of some use to you guys out here. I’m not used to roughing it, but I learn quick and I’m ready to work” I said, feeling that silly urge to prove myself surface. It always surprised me when it popped up: it mainly surfaced around my brother. Neil had an irritating way of sometimes making me feel a bit girly. Normally it didn’t bother me, but sometimes it did. 

Kris smiled and I was struck again by his good looks. His eyes were a warm ochre and his skin was nicely tanned all over from countless hours in the sun. Nice. 

“That’s good then, cause you won’t get any special treatment out here” someone else called from across the room, and I felt vaguely embarrassed. 

Kris rolled his eyes. “Don’t worry about Ethan over there, he’s in it strictly for the humanitarian aspect, he doesn’t like the thought of a celebrity coming in here for a glory photo before pissing off again without having done any real work”

“I’m not like that,” I said instantly. 

“I know. You ever built a house before Adam?” he asked as we went to a small fold out table and sat down. 

“No, unless you count sand castles, but then you wouldn’t because that would be a …castle” I said lamely, feeling totally out of my depth. These guys and what they did here was so far removed from my life in LA. I was struck by the sudden thought that this was so much more important than what I did for a living. 

Kris chuckled. “You’ll pick it up pretty quickly, we’re all pretty helpful out here, so you won’t be by yourself”

“Cool. How long does it take to get a house up?”

“About a week, then the main team moves on to the next one while a few start on the paint job. It’s not much, and it’s certainly not 5 star, but it’s ten times better than what these people have now. Most of them sleep on the streets or in shanty towns, so they really appreciate the housing”

I nodded, not really knowing what to say. I wanted to get into it and immediately start helping out, but it was getting dark and I noticed people sealing things up. Kris reached over and handed me some food. Dinner for the night. 

“Once you’ve eaten this we usually head back to our tents for some shut eye. I wouldn’t recommend getting up in the night because of the mosquitoes, but if you have to then you just have to be careful. We start up pretty early, so it’s imperative you get a good night’s sleep”

“Sure” I said, eating quickly. It wasn’t overly tasty, but it filled me up and I was soon following after Kris as he led us to our tent. I waved pointedly at Jerry, who lumbered off to his own tent before the flap was sealed. 

I riffled through my bag till I found the clothes I would be sleeping in, and found Kris already changing behind me, slipping on a pair of soft linen pants and a long sleeved shirt. Ugh, it felt like it was at least 200 degrees out here and the guy was wearing long sleeves?

“Just in case a mosquito gets past the nets,” he offered by way of explanation as he released a large net from above his bed, arranging it before climbing into the bed. Ignoring my sudden flare of self- consciousness, I changed quickly and slipped into my own bed, watching the others in the room do the same. It was weird sleeping with a net over me, but I could already hear the buzz of mosquitoes and I really didn’t want to go home with a case of Malaria, so they were necessary. 

It took me ages to get to sleep that first night, I was used to a bit of noise, and it was almost totally silent, save for the soft breathing of my roommates, and the occasional squawk of an animal outside. I don’t know what time it was before I finally dropped off, but I finally did, feeling nervous about my first day of work.


	3. 3

It felt weird waking up in a new bed, in a different room. I wasn’t used to the natural light spilling in so early, nor was I used to the sounds of the others all moving around. I hadn’t had a boyfriend in a long time, so it was weird to listen to their snuffles and soft breathing. It made me feel kinda lonely. 

“Yo Adam? Breakfast is in 15” Kris said softly to me as he passed my bunk, slipping quickly out the tent flap. I sighed softly and rolled over, brushing at the damp sweat on my forehead. Fucking hell it was hot here, even at…ugh 6:45am. Great. I really needed a shower, but unfortunately according to Dave, this place had no running water. Crap. 

Amazingly I managed to get dressed in 10 minutes, pulling my fresh clothes over my sweaty skin and tossing the old ones in my bag before heading in the direction Kris had gone, wishing there wasn’t any mosquito’s so I could wear short sleeves. Oh well, at least I wouldn’t get sunburnt. 

Everyone glanced up at me as I came into the small room where the meals were, which made me feel even more like an outsider than I already did. I was sure I looked ok: I wasn’t wearing any make-up and didn’t have any product in my hair. Maybe they were just curious, so I just took a seat at the far end of the table, accepting the plastic-wrapped food that came my way. 

“Ok troops, we’re going to get started on those frames we set up last week. Tanya, you and Mike are going to focus on the paint jobs on those places we put up yesterday, Dave, you, me, Jerry and Adam here are going to start putting those frames together. I know we’re short on numbers but we’ll just have to make do” Kris said, standing up and giving us a bit of a pep talk. He was awfully charismatic, and I felt a little zing of motivation snap through me once he sat down. 

“You’re very good at that,” I said once he’d sat down. 

He smiled. “I’ve done it for a while now. Been on two mission trips before I was here you know”

“When did you do those?”

“Just after college, I graduated last year then did work in Africa and Indonesia”

“Cool” I said, disposing of my rubbish in the bin provided and following him as we made our way back out into the main part of the camp. 

“Ok, so we’ve got your gloves here” Kris said handing me a pair of yellow workers gloves. I was already wearing long pants and sneakers, a long sleeved shirt and a hat. I had sun block in my pocket as well, so I felt like I was all set to go. It was fucking hot though, sweat was dripping down between my shoulder blades, and I could feel beads on my forehead too. A shower would be freaking awesome right about now. 

“Alrighty, let’s get to work” Kris said, immediately marching off across the ground. I headed off with the others, noticing Jerry in my group. Unfortunately Ethan was also in the group, and I rolled my eyes inwardly, hoping he didn’t antagonise me too much today. 

The frames we were to put up were on the ground protected by large green tarps to keep the water from getting into the wood. It didn’t take long for Kris to direct me on where to stash them, and soon we were all working hard on constructing the framework for the small house we would be building. It was damn hard work, I’d never built a real house before, but everyone was helpful, and I even found myself working alongside Kris for a while, which was a welcome change from Ethan. 

“So what do you do for a living Kris?” I asked, holding a beam while he hammered another smaller one to it. Despite the fact that we were working, I still wanted to get to know him better. 

“Well, I just finished college, I studied Music with a major in composition. I haven’t found full time work yet, but I’m still looking”

“Cool, so you’re a musician?” I asked. This was a bit easier, music was something I understood, something I lived and breathed. 

“Yeah, but I don’t know, it’s not really paying very well right now. We can’t all be huge rock stars like you”

I shook my head, now hammering my own nail into another beam before he helped me lift it up. “I worked for years in the industry before I made it. I don’t think I would have if I hadn’t gone on Idol”

“Really?”

“Totally. I was just sitting around on my butt, wondering if this was all my life was going to be. Then I made the decision to go on Idol”

“After a mushroom-induced vision at Burning Man right?” Kris asked sneakily, watching me out of the corner of his eye. 

“Have you been reading up on me Mr Allen?” I teased, wiping my forehead. 

Kris laughed. “Maybe a bit. I had to know what to expect”

I smirked, raising an eyebrow. “I think you’ll find that I rarely do things people expect”

“And that doesn’t, you know…make you nervous?”

I chuckled. “Nope. In the words of Bon Jovi, this is my life. I’m not going to pander to people: I did enough of that when I was starting out. I’m not going to be a diva either, but I stand up for what I want, and don’t take much crap from anyone”

“That’s pretty brave” Kris mused softly, pausing for a moment to consider my actions. He watched while I hefted the frame so that it was standing up. 

“It’s done”

A smile quirked his lips and that little current of electricity flew through me again. 

“Now we just have to do four more, and we have the beginnings of a house. You right holding that for a sec? I’ll just grab the tarp and we can lay it down and get started on the next one”

I nodded and waited for him to lay the tarp before he helped me lower the frame onto it. We paused for a moment and he tossed me a bottle of water. 

“It’s so hot out here,” I said after I’d drunk almost half the bottle. 

“Just wait till we get rain, it gets ten times more humid then”

“Great” I mutter darkly as we head back to work. The others have constructed another wall, which leaves us with two to go. It’s hard and exhausting work, and I think I’ve lost about 5 pounds just from sweat, but Kris and I spend the rest of the afternoon chatting and getting to know each other, which gives me a distraction from the oppressive heat. 

“So you living in LA? It’s the showbiz capital, if you want to break into the biz you should think about it” 

Kris shook his head. “No, I’m still living at home in Arkansas with my folks”

“You ever thought about moving?”

Kris shrugged. “I don’t know, Dad’s not really too keen on me moving away from home. He wants me to take over the family business”

“He doesn’t want you to pursue music?”

Kris shrugged again and his expression darkened. “Not exactly. Could you hold that for a sec?”

He handed me a hammer and the conversation stopped. It was obvious he wasn’t happy about something, and I wondered if I’d upset him by talking about his family. I glanced around at the others while he fiddled with something in his tool -box, and noticed they weren’t talking, well not as much as we’d been. Had I broken some kind of rule? Were we not supposed to talk about ourselves?

“Do you get any time off here? What do you do for fun?” I asked after a while. 

Kris glanced up, his expression neutral now. “We don’t get a lot of time to ourselves, only when the weather is bad, but occasionally we head to a lagoon not far from here”

“You’ll have to show me sometime” I said, adjusting my hat. I could feel the skin on the back of my neck burn slightly, so I took a moment to slather some more sun block on it. 

“If we get time, sure” he said. 

I nodded and we resumed our work, but for some reason the conversation felt strained between us now. But instead of beating myself up about my apparent social gaffe, I focussed on the work, and when I finally fell into bed that night, I slept like a log.


	4. 4

We are all at it again bright and early the next morning, and I fail to suppress my groan when my muscles protest as I get out of bed. Ouch, I didn’t even know I had muscles there. Some of the others offer sympathetic looks as they head out for the day, but all I can think of, was how nice scalding water would feel on my stiff shoulders. 

“Sore?” Kris asked as he slipped a shirt on over his bare chest. I catch a glimpse of his nice tan before the fabric obscures him from view. 

“Yeah I can barely move,” I mumble, hissing in pain when I roll my shoulders. 

Kris glances around, and after making sure the tent is empty, he squeezes in behind me on the bunk. I’m surprised to feel his hands on my shoulders, lightly kneading the flesh. 

“What are you doing?”

“Helping out. We want you physically able, not grimacing all day” his voice is soft in my ear and I feel goose bumps rising on my skin. Not for the first time I realise he’s exactly my type, I like my guys younger, petite and cute. Lucky for me, Kris fits all three. He’s got beautiful eyes too. 

“Hot running water would make a hell of a difference right now” I mutter, thinking of the hasty bath I’d gotten last night by splashing water from the water bottle onto my skin. I felt far from clean, and was probably a bit stinky. 

Kris chuckled and pressed with the heel of his hand into my back, working out the tight knots he found there. His hands felt nice on my skin. I’d always been a tactile person. I bet his hands would feel nice in my hair too. 

“Ok, you’re good to go now. Lucky you’re not wearing any of that make-up you always seem to be wearing, otherwise you’d definitely need to bathe,” he said, jumping off and reaching for his fresh clothes. 

I need to fucking bathe right now I grouch as I do the same, remarkably, my shoulders do feel a bit better after his lovely little massage: still sore as hell, but a bit better. 

“I didn’t mean to upset you yesterday, you know when I talked about your family. You got kind of quiet,” I offer after a moment. 

Kris looked a little uncomfortable. “Yeah, it’s cool. My parents are giving me a bit of shit right now. I don’t really like talking about it”

“I’m sorry,” I said, noticing Kris’s eyes on my arm, and the tattoo’s there. 

“Did those hurt?” he asked curiously. 

I shrugged. “A bit, but it’s more like sandpaper scratching over your skin. You don’t have any then?”

Kris laughed. “No, Dad would kill me. Tattoos aren’t the sort of thing a Vice President of a business gets. I’m pretty sure I’d be shot if I ever got one”

Ah, so that was it then. Kris’s parents were pressuring him into joining the family business and by the sounds of it, he didn’t want to. Interesting. 

“What if you got one where no-one would see?” I suggest, lacing my work boots. 

Kris shook his head. “No, I wouldn’t know what to get, and there’s no way I’m getting one here. Someone got hepatitis about a month ago from an infected needle”

“Gross”

He stood up. “Yep, come on we better get moving we don’t want to be working on an empty stomach”

Breakfast is the usual tasteless meal, and we’re soon back out on the grounds continuing on with our work from the day before. I’m helping one of the other guys – Jamie - with a beam when Dave comes over to us. 

“Hey Kris, did that shipment of supplies come in?” he asked, scratching absently at his arm. 

Kris shook his head. “No, we haven’t gotten anything new. What was in it?”

“Lumber mostly, and I think Tanya wanted some more paint. Should we head out and get it? It might be in town”

“Yeah I guess, hey Adam you want to come for a drive?” Kris asked, glancing my way. 

“Sure” 

“Ok, once you finish up there come grab me and we’ll head into town, I’ve just got to sort out a few details and then we can go” he said, heading off with Dave to another part of the camp. 

I turned back to what I was doing, finding Jamie smirking at me. 

“What?”

He chuckled. “You like him”

I scoffed, trying to fend off his rather accurate assumption. “What makes you say that?”

“He talks to you about stuff, he talks to us guys too, but not about the things he tells you”

I didn’t exactly know what to say to that, so I kept working, sawing at the beam so it was the right length. Sweat dripped off me in a steady trickle and I was puffed by the time it was finished. 

“He helps you out too”

“I’m sure he helps you too,” I said, reaching for my water. It’s so hot out here that staying hydrated is important. I must have drunk my body weight in water by now, and it was only 11am. 

“He does, but it’s different with you”

“Maybe that’s cause I’m not overly masculine. You guys are all tough and stuff, I’m not used to working like this”

“You’re masculine, trust me, I’ve seen the way he looks at you”

I roll my eyes. “Whatever you reckon”

“He’s single”

“Good for him” I retort, even though it’s encouraging. 

“And he bats for your team”

That stopped me. “Kris is gay?”

Jamie nodded, a knowing look in his eyes. “Yep.”

I pursed my lips and stared off over the ground, watching an iguana crawl up a tree. I usually pride myself on my gaydar, any gay guy does, we have a heightened ability to sense our own kind, but I’d never for once thought Kris was gay. Huh. 

“Yo Adam! You good to go?” Kris called, waving at me. 

“Yeah” I answered, thumping Jamie’s shoulder as I went past, trying to ignore his chuckles. 

“So where are these supplies?” I ask as I reach the car. It’s the same one Dave collected me from the airport in. Kris gets in and we trundle off over the ground till we reach the main road. 

“Our lumber usually comes directly into the camp, but sometimes it get‘s held up in town. There’s a warehouse about 20 minutes out of town. The guy who runs it is a real help, he’s awesome”

“Cool” 

It doesn’t take us long to get to the warehouse, and a tall skinny guy wearing a loud Hawaiian shirt comes out to greet us. 

“Kris! Good to see you, I’m sorry about this, but things got caught up and we couldn’t get it out to you” he says, clapping Kris on the back. His words are heavily accented, and he offered me a friendly smile as I walked up. 

“So where’s the stuff? We’ll take it now, that way we can get straight back to work” Kris was saying as we walked into the warehouse. The sweet woodsy smell of timber made me draw in an appreciative breath as I followed behind, listening to the two of them talk business. 

“The shipment is all here, already paid for by that generous father of yours. All you have to do is load it up”

Kris smiled. “Great, thanks Paul”

It was cool out here, and while I waited for them to finish the paperwork I undid the top button of my shirt, letting the cool air hit my skin and almost moaning aloud. Unfortunately, my relief was short lived, as Kris beckoned me over. 

“See that timber in there? We need to get that into our truck”

I blinked. “That’s going to take a while” 

Kris laughed. “We better get to it then. I want to make another stop on the way home”

It takes us nearly an hour to get all the planks into the back of the truck, and my arms and legs feel like jelly by the time we’re finished. After we’re done we sit for a while, letting the cool air wash over us. I’m guzzling water like it’s going out of fashion. 

“I think you’re trying to kill me”

Kris laughed. “I’m not, this is just a normal everyday occurrence for our little group”

“How long am I staying again?” I laughed, fiddling with the label on the water bottle. 

“You are enjoying it though right?”

“Yeah, it’s really great” I said seriously, glancing over at him. 

He smiled and stood up. “Come on, we’ve got one more place to stop at before we head back”


	5. 5

Turns out the final place Kris took me to that afternoon was a small orphanage about 10 kilometres away from our camp. Like our camp, it was pretty run down, but there was a medium sized brick building with a run down fence around the perimeter. Kris honked the horn on the truck as we trundled up and about 50 kids all ran out screaming loudly. 

A plump woman came out slowly, her weathered face splitting into a grin when she saw who it was. Kris had obviously been here before, and judging from the radiant expression on his face, he liked it here. We pulled up a little distance away. 

“This is one of hundreds of orphanages here. We do some work for them from time to time, but I haven’t been out here for a while. Come on, I think you’ll like it”

The lady at the gate gave his hand a squeeze when we walked up, and he slipped an arm around her and started walking slowly into the grounds. The kids had quieted down a bit, but were still excited to see us. Kris seemed perfectly occupied, so I turned to the kids, reaching for an apple I’d shoved in my trouser pocket and handing it to a little boy at my elbow. 

“What’s your name?” he asked, his voice soft. His eyes were wide and he was thin, his clothes hanging off him. All the other kids were like that too, and it made my heart ache. Those commercials for World Vision had always gotten to me, now it was ten times worse actually being here. 

“I’m Adam, what’s your name?” I asked, sitting down on the front steps of the building. The kids all sat down with me, some at my feet, others up higher. One little girl even climbed into my lap, and I was amazed at her trusting nature. 

“I’m Enoch” he said, and proceeded to tell me all the names of the other kids there. He told me the little girl in my lap was called Leila. 

“My Mom’s name is Leila too,” I said, gazing down into her wide brown eyes. Her hair was short and her skin was clear, and she had a little pink dress on. She was lovely. 

“Really?”

I nodded. “Yes, you’re very pretty, just like her”

She smiled and put her arm around my neck. Enoch handed the apple around so that each child got a mouthful of the juicy fruit. I wished I’d brought more for them. Maybe I could come back if there was time. 

“Hey you guys know any songs?” I asked, glancing around the small group. A couple of them nod, and I tentatively start singing the first lines of ‘Alouette’, hoping that they knew it. 

_“Alouette, gentile Alouette. Alouette je te plumerai…”_

Soon enough most of the kids start singing with me, and I’m amazed I can even remember the French words. My singing teacher used to give this song to me back when I first started singing, and for some reason I’ve retained the French. We sing it through twice. 

“Can you teach me a song you guys sing here?” I ask, curious. 

Little Leila nods and starts singing a sweet little song in French, her voice soft. I do my best to follow the words, but it’s a little hard. I don’t know the language very well, but I think they’re singing something about a crocodile. It’s nice sitting here and singing with them, and I hope I brought a little joy to their lives. 

I’m not sure how long I sat there with the kids, singing all sorts of songs till Kris comes back, the lady walking with him. They paused for a moment to listen to what we are doing. Kris has got a sort of gentle smile on his face, which brings a blush to my cheeks. 

“We better head off Adam, they’re going to need the supplies back at camp,” he said softly. 

I sighed. “Yeah, just give me a sec”

Saying goodbye to those kids was really hard, especially when Leila clung to my hand and followed me to the car. God I just wanted to pick her up and never let go, she stirred my paternal instinct and made me long for a child of my own. 

“Will you come back and see me Adam?” she asked. 

I picked her up, hugging her to my chest. “Of course sweetie. You’ll have to show me some more songs when I come back”

“I will,” she said, hugging me one more time until I set her down. She waved as we drove slowly away and I felt kinda sad. Despite the little those kids had, they seemed happy and I wanted to spend more time with them. In truth I wanted to build them a palace so they could all live comfortably. It wasn’t fair. 

“You’re very quiet” Kris commented after a while. 

I glanced up. “Oh yeah, just thinking I guess”

“Those kids are pretty special aren’t they?”

I sighed. “Yeah. Do you feel like you want to give them the world?”

“I do, every time I see them”

I smiled and went back to staring out the window at the passing landscape. Ever since arriving here I’d been aware of the differences between where I was, and where I came from, but visiting those kids had really made it real. It was no wonder Angelina Jolie spent so much of her time working with aid organisations, right then I sort of felt like I wanted to as well. 

“You ok?” Kris asked once we’d pulled into our camp. He gave my shoulder a squeeze. 

“Yeah I’m just feeling inadequate”

He rubbed my shoulder. “You’re not inadequate Adam, you’ve shown me a lot since you’ve come here”

My traitorous cheeks flushed again. “Thanks”

He winked and I felt like he was suddenly flirting with me. 

“Come on, let’s go grab some lunch”

***

There was a big storm that night, wind lashing our tents and rain falling in torrents. The power went down for a while at some point, which didn’t really make all that much difference because we were sitting in darkness anyway. Kris said the backup generator would take care of the electronics in the small building that housed the administrative services.

“Will those frames be ok?” I wondered, thinking of all the hard work we’d done. 

“They should be fine. Ethan tied them all down earlier, must have heard on the radio about the storm”

I sighed and rolled over in my bunk, fanning my face with my hand. The storm seemed to have increased the humidity by at least 100 times, and it felt like the tent was going to be blown away entirely, hopefully not with me in it. 

“Are you single?” Kris asked me suddenly, and I rolled to face him, watching the lightening illuminate his face in the darkness. 

“Yes, have been for a while now” I said, not sure exactly where he’s going with this. 

“You know I find that hard to believe”

I snorted. “You know I hate that phrase. People are always telling me they’re surprised I’m single. I always say if you’re wondering that, then why don’t you take me out?”

Kris was silent for a moment. “Are you asking me, to ask you out?”

Now it’s my turn to fall silent. “Maybe. That depends”

“Oh what?”

 _Crap Adam, get yourself out of this one stylishly._ Thank God Kris can’t see my face right now. 

“On you actually. Ball’s in your court now dude, just know that there’s interest on this side” I said glibly, rolling over and away from his face. My heart is beating a little fast and I’m sure my cheeks are flushed, which is kinda nice because it’s been a while since I’ve felt this way about someone. 

Kris doesn’t say anything after that, and I’m a little disappointed, but decide to let it go. Maybe he’s working up to it, or maybe I’ve scared him off. That would be fucking awesome: no one likes the predatory gay guy. Oh well, at least he knows I’m interested in him.

***

The storm has passed by the time the sun rises, and as I’m quickly becoming used to, there is already a fine sheen of sweat on my skin. Kris is snoring softly from across the tent, and I take a moment to blatantly stare at him. His linen shirt has ridden up a bit, exposing his firm stomach. It’s a rather nice view if I do say so myself.

What is waiting for me on the outside of my mosquito net isn’t quite as nice. There is a motherfucking huge Huntsman spider sitting on the outside of the net. Its leg span is freaking huge: it’s at least the size of a dinner plate. Great, just fucking great. I have to somehow get out of this damn net without disturbing the spider enough to make it move. Handle this carefully Lambert, carefully now, slowly…slowly…OH shit it’s coming at me!!

“Fuck!” I yell as I hit the floor, the stupid net twisted around my ankles. I have no idea where the spider has gone, so I wriggle around on the floor for a while trying to escape the fucking net. Finally I’m free, and am immediately hit by the sounds of snorting laughter from the opposite bed. Fabulous, my little moment has a witness. 

Kris is laughing from the safety of his bunk, and if the spider wasn’t so big and gross, I would have picked it up and thrown it on him. 

“Your face!” he chortled, throwing his head back.

“You shut up! That thing was fucking huge!” I said, pushing aside the net and standing up. The spider is nowhere to be seen, hopefully he’s decided to crawl off and terrorise someone else. 

“Oh my God stand still Adam” Kris said, laughter still in his voice. 

“What? Is it on me? Tell me right now” I said, freezing and holding my position as Kris stepped slowly forward. He swiped at my back and sure enough, that damn monster spider scurries away. 

“Ugh!” I said, dancing around, trying to erase the feeling of the spider on me. Kris chuckled. 

“Why aren’t you killing that beast?” I asked, scratching my arms. Sand flies, while invisible, leave a pretty damn itchy bite, and I’ve acquired a few. 

“It’s considered bad luck to kill them, they eat a whole lot of other bugs and shit,” Kris said, going back to his bunk. 

“Aren’t you getting dressed?”

“I will, in a sec. I don’t think we’ll be getting much work done today though”

“Why?”

He shrugged. “We can work this morning, but I think we should all take the afternoon off, head out to the lagoon for a swim”

“Ahh, you’re finally showing me the infamous lagoon. Well as long as there’s no creature in it, I’m all in”

“You’re funny”

“Glad I amuse you”

Kris shook his head at me, and I realised his cheeks were slightly flushed. Seems there may be interest on his end as well. Huh. 

“You sure it’s safe?”

Kris rolled his eyes. “Yes I’m sure. Some of the locals even go there, it’s fine”

“As long as you’re sure”


	6. 6

The lagoon is a veritable paradise: the water is cool and sweet on my body as I follow the others in. It’s not too deep, but that’s fine as I sink beneath the water for a second, letting the water wash away any dirt I’ve accumulated. I’m sure I’m not as dirty as I think, but it still feels nice. 

“So how’d you find this place?” I asked Kris, who was perched on a rock near me. The others were all in the water. 

“Dave found it one day, I can’t remember how. We’ve been coming here for a while now. It’s perfectly safe, apart from the leeches”

I blinked. “Leeches?”

Kris nodded. “Yep, leeches. Relax Adam, they won’t kill you”

I scowled, but the water felt too nice to keep me worried for too long. The storm we had the previous night seemed to have wrought havoc on the land, there were tree branches everywhere and general debris scattered around. The frames we’d built were fine: the tarp’s covering them had protected them from the weather. 

“How long are you here for again?” Kris asked after a while. 

“I’m here for two weeks, then I go back to LA”

“To some fancy party?”

I shook my head. “Definitely not. I’m going to be swamped by meetings when I get there. We’re in the middle of planning my next tour and there’s a shit ton of stuff to work out”

“So why’d you come here if you were so busy?”

“I needed a break. I kept getting migraines and was just burnt out you know? My assistant set this up for me: she did some work with you after the Earthquake in 2010”

“Really? Who was she?”

“Lane Newland, tall, blonde, good looking. You know her?”

Kris shook his head. “No I think she was here before I was”

“What will you do when you go home?”

Kris sighed. “I’ll go back to Arkansas and take my place as VP of my Dad’s business”

“What do they do?”

He scrunched up his nose. “You know I’m not actually sure? That sounds great doesn’t it, seeing as how I’m going to be running it one day. Something to do with contracts I think”

“Why don’t you pursue your music?”

Kris glanced at me. “Just like that?”

“No, not just like that. It’s fucking hard work to get started, believe me. First thing you do is put together a demo”

“I’ve already done that, been doing it for a few months now. I don’t think it sells any more than 10 copies, and the only people who buy it are the guys at the University where my friend Cale sells them”

“That’s a start though! It took me ages to get together a demo, have you done any session work as a singer?”

“No, but it’s stupid anyway. I’ve got to go into the family business, I’ve tried my music and it hasn’t taken off, so I’ve got to settle down”

I frowned. “Do you honestly believe that?”

“I have to, there’s nothing else to do with my life, I can’t stay out here forever”

“How old are you?”

Kris sighed. “I’m 25”

“Kris you’re old enough to do whatever the hell you want with your life. Why go into something you hate and admittedly, don’t understand? Why not pursue your music?”

“It’s not that easy, Arkansas isn’t exactly a music city”

“So move? LA isn’t that far away, and there’s plenty of housing. You could pick up a job somewhere and work on your music at the same time”

Kris scoffed lightly. “I can’t do that Adam, it wouldn’t work”

“Why not?”

“It just wouldn’t! I just have to face it: my musical pursuits are over. Time to find a partner and settle down”

I sighed and glanced away, wondering why he was so adamant it wouldn’t work out. I’d done it, and if a fat, freckled ginger had succeeded in the music industry, than a good-looking guy like him could too. 

“Do your parents know what you want to do?”

Kris looked like he didn’t want to discuss it anymore, but he answered. 

“No, Dad is pushing me into the company, and Mom is too busy with her other shit to worry about it. You know they won’t even acknowledge that I’m gay? It just doesn’t compute for them”

“You ever brought a boyfriend home before?”

“Once, and it didn’t end well. I’ve never been so embarrassed by my own family in my life”

“That must’ve sucked,” I said sympathetically. 

“Yeah. I haven’t been with anyone since then” Kris said gloomily. 

I smiled grimly. Sometimes it just plain sucked when you were alone. When I split with my last boyfriend it had been mutual, but it had still hurt, still took me a while to get over. 

“Kris I think you should move to LA”

He glanced up. “You’re sweet, but I don’t think it’ll ever happen”

Well that was apparently that. Kris seemed pretty determined to settle for his miserable life, and it seemed like I couldn’t do much about it. It didn’t sit right with me though, and I hated the thought of him wasting away in an office when he could be making music. Of course I hadn’t heard him sing, so he could be shit, or tone deaf, but I doubted that. 

It was getting on dark by the time we left the lagoon, and after dinner we all sat around in one of the tents, talking quietly before bed. There was a slight breeze coming in the tent window, which was awesome as I was beginning to feel well and truly sick of being hot. Maybe I’d move to Alaska when I got home. 

“So Adam why don’t you sing us a song?” Jamie asked suddenly. 

“I’m sure you guys don’t want to hear that”

“No way man! Show us what you got. Kris? You get your guitar, I’m sure you guys can work something out”

Kris nodded and reached for a guitar I hadn’t noticed before. 

“You know Mad World?” I asked. 

He nodded. “Sure. Ready? 1, 2, 3, 4…” he said, counting us in as he started strumming the opening chords. He played pretty damn well, and after we’d finished I asked him to do one of his songs. 

“Ok fine, but my voice is nothing on this guy’s,” he said bashfully, plucking out a mid-tempo melody on his guitar. The song was good, cruisey and mellow, as was his voice. I was pretty sure he’d kill it in LA. If only I could get him there. 

We all hang out for a while after he’d finished the song, and it was just before midnight when everyone decided to head to bed. Kris set his guitar aside and started getting ready for bed, obviously deep in thought. I didn’t want to bring up his music again, didn’t want to seem like I was harping on it, but I just couldn’t let it go. 

“Kris?”

“I don’t particularly want to talk about it Adam. Let’s just go to bed,” he snapped, wrenching aside his sheet and climbing into bed. 

I sighed and let it go, climbing into bed myself. Kris turned out the light and we were plunged into darkness, but for some reason I couldn’t sleep. I must have slept at some point, because I awoke sometime after 3am. I could hear distant voices, and the hair on my arms prickled when I heard a distant volley of gunshots. 

“Kris? You hear that?” I whispered, skin prickling again when the voices sounded again, this time closer. 

_Fuck this, he needs to wake up._ I scramble out of bed and crawl across the floor to his bunk, shaking him violently. He starts awake. 

“What the hell are you doing?”

“Shh, I can hear voices, I think we should get out of here”

In the moonlight pouring in the tent window I see his eyes widen, and he reaches for his jacket. 

“Grab your stuff. Now” he said, and my heart started pumping in my chest. I grab my bag and slip my shoes on, shoving my passport in my pocket just in case I lose the bag. Sweat beads on my temple and I feel adrenaline start to rush through my veins. 

While I’ve been getting organised Kris has woken Tanya, and she quickly grabs her jacket and something from her bag. 

“What the fuck’s going on?”

“I think it’s a raid. Adam you need to stick to me like glue man, come on” Kris said, grabbing my hand and slowly opening the tent door. The voices are clearer out here, and I can see other people in the distance. Most of the people of our camp are awake by now, gathered in front of their tents. 

“Guys we need to split up, grab anything of value and head out in small groups. Don’t come back till morning,” Kris whispered urgently, but I can see the others have already grabbed what stuff they want. 

We don’t say anything more then, as the voices are closer. Kris grips my hand tight and heads off into the brush, ducking and weaving, slipping through the trees like he’s a part of them. I stumble along beside him, trying to make my footsteps as light as his are, but I don’t think it’s working. I feel like I’m making so much noise, a freaking stampede. 

I don’t know how long we run for, but I’ve got a stitch by the time we stop and I’m breathing hard. Kris shoved me to the ground, settling down beside me behind a massive boulder. It’s only then that I realise I’m shaking, trembling hard from a mixture of fear and adrenaline. My cheeks are wet too, and I realise there’s tears mixed in with the sweat. 

Kris is scanning the ground, his eyes trained on the way we’ve come, but he’s still got hold of my hand, and he squeezes my fingers suddenly. 

“It’s ok, we got out quickly. I don’t think anyone’s followed us,” he whispered, turning to face me. 

“It’s ok Adam, hey it’s ok”

I shook my head, too focussed on keeping from falling apart to do anything else. That was too close, too fucking close. 

“What do we do now?” I whispered eventually, hating the tremor in my voice. 

“We wait here till morning, hopefully the others have all scurried off somewhere”

“Has this happened before?”

Kris sighed quietly. “Once, a long time ago. There’s a reason we tell people not to wander off alone”

I shifted closer to him, feeling more scared than I have in a long time. To my surprise Kris puts his arm around me, giving my shoulders a quick squeeze. To my embarrassment, I started to sniffle again. _For fucks sake Adam hold yourself together._

“It’s ok” Kris said again, rubbing my back. 

“I’ve never been so scared in my life” I admitted, wiping my eyes. 

“What if the others don’t come back?”

Kris shook his head. “Don’t think like that. They know what to do if this happens, they’ll be fine” 

I nodded but didn’t know what to say. While I didn’t know the others very well I hated the thought that something may have happened to them. My thoughts suddenly turned to Jerry, and I hoped he was ok. Lane was going to fucking kill me when she heard about this. 

“I feel sick,” I whispered after a while. 

Kris rubbed my back again. “It’s just the fear and adrenaline, here have some water”

The water didn’t feel like it made much of a difference on my shaky stomach, but it was a nice offer. 

“How do we know when to go back?”

Kris sighed. “We don’t really. We’ll head back in the morning”

“We’re staying out here all night?” I squeaked. 

Kris shifted closer. “Yeah, it’ll be fine Adam, try to get some sleep”

I don’t think I slept a wink that night, but it’s nice to have Kris’s arms around me. He seemed to be pretty relaxed about sleeping out in the middle of the Haitian wilderness, so I sneakily snuggled closer, still feeling shaky. 

A sudden rustling in the bushes near us makes me jump, and Kris’s arms tightened around me. 

“Shhh” he whispered, his hands resuming their soothing motions. Everything feels so different out here, its as if I’m hyper aware of every movement, every sound. I’m definitely aware of the man lying beside me, of his warm hands roaming my back. Embarrassingly, I feel myself harden and hope he can’t feel it. 

“Is that..?”

Oh God. 

“Sorry” I mumbled, feeling my face flame. I swear to God no-one has ever made me blush as much as this guy. 

He chuckled lightly, and moved closer, his hands pulling me close till I’m practically on top of him. Surprisingly, I can feel his hips start to move against my own, just slow little movements, nothing too much. It’s enough though, and he makes me grow even harder. 

“Adam?”

“Mhh-hmm?”

“Would you mind if I kissed you right now?”


	7. 7

“I’d love it if you kissed me”

Kris smiled and slid closer, and I’m even more aware of how vulnerable we are, hidden away in the undergrowth, but as his lips closed over mine I didn’t really care. 

As far as first kisses go, it’s pretty good. His lips are soft and sure, there’s none of that fumbling awkwardness that usually comes with one’s first romantic movement. He tastes faintly of mint, like he’d eaten a tic-tac hours ago and the taste is still lingering in his mouth. 

“Mhmm” I said softly, slipping my arm under his tee to stroke along the taut musculature. He had none of that softness I hated about my own body: he was all muscle, with a firm tight ass. I splayed each hand over the tight globes, squeezing gently as his lips grew harder against mine. His tongue sought entrance and I moaned again as I opened my mouth, squeezing his ass a little more as I felt my cock grow even harder. 

“Oh God” he murmured as I rose above him, straddling his waist, my lips harder against his mouth. God those noises coming out of him were hot, my dick was rock hard as I moved slowly above him, nibbling along his jaw line, tasting the sharp tang of sweat. 

“Wait…just wait a second” he said breathlessly just as I slid my hand along the waist -band of his trousers. 

“What?” I asked, my own voice equally breathless. 

“We can’t do this out here” he said, sitting up a little and forcing me to sit on my haunches over his groin. Fuck he felt good, smelled good, tasted good. 

“Why not?”

He raised an eyebrow. “Adam we’re in the middle of the Haitian wilderness, hiding from a gang whose just raided out camp. We don’t have any protection, and I’m pretty sure if we get caught like this, we’ll be shot”

Well, when you put it like that, having sex in public didn’t really seem like a good idea. I sighed and rolled off him, scrubbing at my face. He made a funny sound and rolled closer. 

“Not so far away” he said, wriggling under my arm. 

I chuckled, and as if suddenly remembering that we were hiding from rebels in the woods, clapped a hand over my mouth. 

“They would have heard you by now” Kris whispered, chuckling. 

“Shut the fuck up, I wasn’t the one moaning”

“Can’t help it” he grumped, and pressed a little kiss to my neck. I kissed him again and snuggled closer, trying to ignore my raging case of blue balls. 

“Go to sleep Adam, I’ll take first watch,” he said after a while, gently carding his fingers through my hair. I’d been right in my previous fantasy about that: it felt amazing. 

“It’ll be light soon,” I said, feeling my eyes drift shut despite of myself. I wanted to stay awake with him, but the adrenaline it seemed, had finally worn off, and I was damn tired. 

“I know, hush now: just try to get some sleep. I’ll wake you if I hear anything” he said, settling in against me. 

“Ok” I mumbled, closing my eyes. I felt him press his lips to my forehead once more before I finally fell asleep.

***

It’s daylight when I wake up, and Kris is snoring softly beside me, his arm still draped over me. The sun has already risen, and the air is warm and sticky, drying the faint dew on both our bodies.

“Kris” I whispered, shaking him gently. His nose twitched and his eyes opened slowly. 

“Oh, I fell asleep”

I reached for his hand. “I noticed”

He smiled sleepily and moved closer, kissing me softly. I pulled away. 

“Morning breath”

He smirked. “Do you think I care? Come here, I’ve wanted to do this for a while now”

“Why didn’t you?” I murmured between kisses, my hand moulding to the curve of his jaw. I’ll admit, I’m a face-holder. I like something to hold onto when I’m kissing someone. Kris has got a nice jaw line. 

“Honestly? You kind of intimidated me a bit. You’re this huge rock star who’s all confident and sexy. I’m just boring old me, nothing too special”

“Hey, I think you’re an amazing person, you’re just a bit lost right now” I said, focussing my lips on the corner of his mouth. 

He blushed and we finally broke apart to breathe, still lying close. There was something spiritual in breathing the same air as someone else, I felt like I could taste him in the space between us. 

“So I intimidate you do I?” I asked after a moment. 

“Not anymore, well not right now anyway”

“I’m just a guy you know”

Kris gave me a look, which eerily reminded me of the same one my mother gave me whenever I doubted myself. 

“You’re Adam fucking Lambert” he said, as if that explained everything. 

I sighed and rolled closer, resting my face in the crook of his neck. It felt nice to be this close: it was as natural as breathing. It was nice to be able to be this relaxed around someone, I usually work a bit differently, am usually a bit more cautious, but with him I felt like I could be totally normal.

“We should get back, make sure the others are ok”

I nodded. “Yeah, come on then, help me up. I’m all stiff”

He smirked and I smacked his ass. “Kristopher Allen you behave yourself. Assist me”

After a bit of groaning, I managed to clamber to my feet, rubbing at the sore spot on my back. Spending a night sleeping on the ground wasn’t so good for your muscles. Kris was grimacing a bit too. 

“So how far do you reckon we got from the camp?”

He shrugged and reached for my hand as we started walking. “I’m not sure. I don’t think we’re too far away”

“Is this going to make you want to go home sooner?”

I shrugged. “I don’t know. I’m sure when my management hears about this, they’re not going to be happy, but I’d like to stay and finish what I started. Despite the heat, the bugs, and the gangs, I’m having fun here”

Kris smiled. “Really? That’s good”

I gave his fingers a squeeze. “Are we gonna…you know, keep this up? Or…was this only…I don’t know”

Kris’s face fell a little bit. “Do you want to keep this up? I mean, I really like you: I don’t usually go around kissing random guys. I know I’m pretty boring compared to the guys you usually see, but I’d like to try and make this work”

I stopped and brought him to my chest, kissing him again. His arms went around my waist and even though he had to get on his toes to reach me, it felt good: like he fit. 

“I really like you, I want to try too”

Kris smiled and we started walking again, his arm around me. 

“It’s going to be hard though, I mean, you go home in a little while, you’ve already been here a week, we’re not going to get to see a lot of one another once I go back to Arkansas”

I bit my lip. “You could always…you know, come with me”

“Where would I live?”

“Well, you could stay with me until you find somewhere. If your parents are as well off as you say they are, then finding somewhere shouldn’t be a problem” I said, surprised he wasn’t immediately fighting me on this. 

“I don’t know,” he said, and my heart fell. Whenever we talked about this it always came back to the same issue. Maybe I should’ve just realised that he wasn’t as serious about his music as he said he was, but that felt unfair. Moving away without the support of your parents was a huge thing, and he couldn’t just do it lightly. 

“Just think about it,” I suggested. 

“I will”

We walked for about another 30 minutes or so before we came back upon our camp. It was pretty quiet, and I thought for one horrifying moment that something had happened, but Dave came out as he heard us approach. 

“Oh my God, guys they’re back. Kris has got him, they’re ok” he called as he jogged toward us. He didn’t look hurt, just tired, which was a relief. 

“We thought something had happened to you,” he said, embracing Kris warmly before doing the same to me. He blinked at our joined hands, then grinned knowingly. Fucking hell, was I that transparent? 

“Nah we’re both fine, we just sat it out in the forest about 30 minutes that way” Kris said, pointing in the direction we’d come. 

“Are you guys all ok?” I asked. 

“Oh yeah, I came back around 5 this morning and found it pretty much how we’d left it, which is nice. They did trash our planks though, so we’ll have to get a new order of those going. The frames were fine, they just broke the wood for the new ones”

“Bastards” I heard Kris grumble as we walked slowly into the camp. Jerry marched over and started patting me down, as if doing his own assessment and making sure I was alright. Despite having a stiff back and more sand fly bites than I could count, I was fine. 

“I’m fine Jerry, are you ok?” I asked, watching as Kris was led away by Dave to inspect the damage. 

“I’m fine” Jerry said gruffly, but I could see a smile lingering on his lips. 

“I suppose I should tell Lane about what happened” I said as I wandered back to my tent, dumping my bag back at the foot of the bed where it had lived. The tent didn’t look like it had been too badly damaged, but I was glad I’d taken my passport with me: I needed that baby to get out of here when the time came. 

“You should, she’d want to know what’s going on so she can start to organise your trip home”

I glanced up. “I’m not going home yet Jer, I’m not finished here”

Jerry gave me a look like he’d known this argument was coming. 

“I’m not. I’ve still got about a week left here, and I want to stay. I’ll tell Lane what happened, but she’s not going to bully me into going home yet”

“Fine, but be prepared for a tirade, she’s not going to be happy”

I shrugged and rummaged through my bag for my phone, heading back out of the tent once I’d found it, to stand where I could get the best reception. This was the first time I’d used it since I’d come here, unlike back home, when I was on it quite a lot. 

Lane wasn’t pleased when I told her what had happened: in fact I had to hold the phone away from my ear so she wouldn’t deafen me. 

“Lane everything is ok, it’s fine. I’m fine, nothing happened, it’s all cool” I reassured her, staring off into the distance. 

“I’m going to book you a flight…”

“Don’t. I don’t want to come home yet, I’m not done”

“Adam you could have been kidnapped, held hostage somewhere, or even killed. I want you to come home”

“No. Lane I’ve only got another 5 days here, let me just stay here. Everything will be fine”

She sighed. “Adam I don’t like this at all, I wish you’d listen to me”

I sighed and ran a hand through my hair. “Please just trust me. It’s all going to work out I promise”

“Fine” she snapped, and I felt a little guilty for making her so angry. 

“You know this will be all over the news. I won’t be able to stop it”

“I’m sorry”

She sighed again. “Adam your mother’s going to kill me”

“I know, look Lane I have to go, they’re cleaning up and I don’t want them to think I’m fudging my duties”

“Ok, look I’ll do my best about minimising this in the press. Your flight is still booked for the 14th, so I guess I’ll see you then”

“You will, thanks Lane”

“You be careful over there Adam, I mean it” she said sternly before hanging up. 

I shoved the phone in my back pocket as I headed over to where the others were starting the clean up. Dave had been right when he’d said the planks were trashed, some were sawn in half, others had had holes drilled into them, they were a mess. Kris glanced up as I came over. 

“Everything good?” he asked quietly. 

“Yeah, it’s all fine. They’re probably not happy with me, but I can stay the rest of the week”

“That’s good,” he said, smiling softly. 

“Maybe we could sneak away to that great little lagoon again sometime?” I whispered, winking. Next time I would be sure to have a condom with me, even if I had to brave Haitian rebels to get it. 

Kris’s cheeks coloured slightly, but he nodded. Across the way I didn’t miss the knowing smirk Jamie shot my way. I winked at him and got back to work: daydreaming about the next time I would have Kris to myself. 

Hopefully there wouldn’t be any rebels around this time.


	8. 8

After the raid we can’t do much, apart from clean up. Dave heads off to order another shipment of timber, and a few of our group head back to the frames with tins of paint. At least they can do that. I don’t really know what to do with myself. Picking aimlessly at my dirty shirt, I decided to get changed and head back into the humid tent. 

To my surprise, Kris was in there, a fresh shirt half way over his head. 

“Hey” he said as his head popped out of the hole. 

“Hey” 

I didn’t like it, but it felt a little awkward and I wondered where it had come from. I’d never felt this way around him before, maybe it was because I was about to get changed in front of him, which was stupid because I’d done it before. 

He smiled and watched appreciatively as I got changed, his eyes raking over my bare chest. Unable to stop it, my cheeks flushed. 

“You don’t need to feel embarrassed around me” he said softly, coming closer to rest his hands on my hips. 

“Can’t help it, you make me nervous”

He shook his head and leant forward for a kiss, gently pressing his lips to the seam of my mouth, letting out a soft sound when I let him in. I didn’t feel awkward when I kissed him, quite the opposite, I felt hot and worked up, my dick hardening again. 

“Still nervous now?” he asked when he pulled back, resting our foreheads together. 

I smirked. “No, now I just want to fuck you”

“That can be arranged” 

I kissed him again, sliding my hands around to rest on his ass, dipping my fingers below his waist -band. He pushed his chest and body to mine, letting me feel his erection through his pants. Moaning softly I cupped the back of his head, twisting my fingers through his hair. He still had his hands resting on my hips, but as his lips grew harder against mine, he palmed my crotch, squeezing lightly. Fuck it felt good. 

“I want you,” I whispered between kisses, panting into his mouth. 

“I want you too”

“Can we go somewhere?” I asked, attacking his lips again. 

Kris groaned and peered out the tent window. “I don’t think so, too many people out there, they’d notice”

“How bout a blow job then? Think you can be quiet?” I asked, not giving him time to answer as I dropped to my knees, reaching for his belt. He nodded, wiping his mouth, his lips swollen. 

I grinned up at him and quickly slid his pants down so they pooled around his ankles, before turning to his boxers, and the little wet spot I could see already forming there. I loved that I could make him feel like this. 

“Oh my God” he whispered as I mouthed him through the fabric, pressing my tongue against his bulge. His hands ran through my hair, urging me on as I slid his boxers off entirely, exposing his very erect cock. 

He had a nice cock, smooth and cut, his body hair neat. I licked my lips and heard him groan again as I pressed a soft kiss to his shaft before taking him in my mouth, getting used to the size and feel of him there. The noises coming out of his mouth were filthy hot, and I glanced up to remind him to be quiet. 

He got the message, and shut up as I got to work, licking and sucking, occasionally letting him hit the back of my throat, working through my gag reflex. He didn’t move much, didn’t fuck my face, which I was glad for, I didn’t want to choke on him. I reached up to cup his balls with my free hand, fondling and squeezing them as I licked faster, bobbing my head as I sucked his cock. 

“Gonna come…” he panted, eyes closed as his head fell back. 

I appreciated the warning, but didn’t let off, closing my lips around him, flitting my tongue against his slit repeatedly, coaxing a silent, shuddering orgasm out of him. He tasted good, salty and thick, and I lapped at him, swallowing all he gave. 

“Fucking hell,” he said breathlessly, eyes wide as I stood up, my own cock tenting my pants. He kissed me hard. 

“Get on the bed” he ordered, pushing me back until my knees hit the side of my bunk. I went down gladly, resting on my elbows as he settled between my legs, looking at him while he slipped my pants and briefs off. His eyes widened when my cock sprang to attention before him, and I felt pretty damn good at that. I knew I had a somewhat impressive length. 

Grinning, he ducked his head and I felt his lips on the inside of my thigh as he kissed a path to my dick, pausing a moment before his mouth descended on me. 

“Oh fuck,” I panted, throwing my head back as the warm, wetness enveloped my cock, his tongue a hot pressure as he sucked. It felt really fucking good and I let my legs fall open a bit more, letting out a breathless moan when his palms snuck around to cup my ass cheeks. 

I squeezed my eyes shut when he swallowed around me, letting me hit the back of his throat, the muscles there contracting and driving me closer to the edge. He hummed, and the vibrations shot through me, making me groan out aloud. Teeth lightly scraped along my shaft and I let my arms fall to the bed beside me as he hollowed his cheeks and sucked. God he was like a vacuum, and I felt my balls draw up, my mouth open in a silent scream as I came, panting loudly as I felt him swallow my load. 

He popped off and wiped his mouth delicately before crawling up my body to rest on my chest. 

“How was that?” 

I laughed tiredly and kissed him, tasting myself on his tongue. My legs felt like jelly, and I was pretty sure I couldn’t move. 

“Where’d you lean to suck cock like that?”

He shrugged and traced my eyebrows, as if memorising my features. It was incredibly romantic, especially after that filthy blowjob. 

“I read”

“You read what? Sex books? Erotica? You’re just full of surprises aren’t you?”

He blushed faintly. “Gotta learn somewhere”

I smiled and traced his lips with a finger before cupping his face. 

“I really like you”

He smiled. “I really like you too. Come on, we better get dressed before someone comes looking for us”

“I don’t think I can move”

He chuckled and moved away, reaching for his shirt and pulling his pants back up. He tossed me a shirt. 

“Put that on, then come help me with something”

I groaned and sat up, horny enough to ignore his words and just bend him over. Mmm, tempting. The blowjob had taken the edge off, but I still wanted him. 

“Come on, there’s plenty of time for that later. That shipment Dave ordered won’t come in for a few days. Think of all we could get up to”

I slipped my pants on and yawned suddenly. “Really? Think we could slip away again?”

He smirked. “Definitely”

***

We were plagued by rain for the next two days, which made everything absolutely miserable. The new wood arrived but we can’t do anything with it until the rain stops, and right now it doesn’t look like it’s going to. Foe the most part we all hang around in our tents, or under an awning that’s been set up. It’s fucking boiling, and I’m weary of these conditions, but can’t exactly do anything about it.

“Is this rain likely to stop any time soon?” I asked no-one in particular. The rain fell in a steady torrent down the lip of the awning. 

“Give it another few hours, there’s a system directly over us, it’s moving on though” Kris piped up, bent over a beat-up laptop. Every so often he knocked the side of it, or played with the device that’s picking up the Internet. I’m amazed he can even get a signal out here. 

I sighed and sat back in my chair, brushing my damp hair off my forehead. After a while Kris picked up his guitar, strumming absently at the strings, picking out a melody. It sounds nice with the pattering rain, but it still doesn’t do much to distract me. For some weird reason I feel worked up, frustrated. I need to get laid. 

Kris glanced up, catching my gaze and a current passed between us. It’s been two days since that blowjob, and we haven’t stolen anything more than brief kisses whenever we could. Truthfully, it feels like ages since I’ve had him in my arms, and I’m itching to hold him again. Kris, it seemed, was thinking the same as me, because he shut the computer and stood up, reaching for my hand as he walked past. 

“Just going to check something out Dave. I think the fence line was out over near the lagoon. I’ll check the tarps on my way too” he said, pulling me after him. 

“Sure man” Dave said absently, but I catch Jamie’s eyes as we pass him, and he winks. I have to say it’s pretty obvious what we’re going to do, and I find myself not really caring much that the others will know. It’s not like it would remain a secret for long anyway, living in such close quarters these things are bound to get out. 

“Check the fences huh?” I asked as he pulled me along, the rain pelting my skin. It felt damn nice after the oppressive humidity of the tent. 

Kris just tugged my hand harder, and I spin him suddenly, catching him to my chest for a quick, hungry kiss. 

“Oomph, come on, we’re not far enough away yet” he groaned, licking the water droplets off my lips. His hard on is tenting his pants, and I’m pretty sure I am too, my cock heavy between my legs. 

“Where are we going?” 

“Where do you think?” he said, moving faster through the undergrowth. Oh fuck me, we’re going to the lagoon. 

It doesn’t take us long to get there, and I practically fall on him when we do, licking my way into his mouth, swallowing his grunts of pleasure as his hands twisted in my hair, holding me close. 

“Oh fuck,” he mumbled, his hands at my waist band, fingers fumbling with the belt. Everything’s slippery in the rain, but his movements are frenzied as he pushes my pants down, steadying me when I kick them off entirely. 

His pants are next, and once they hit the ground I reach around to grab his ass, squeezing his cheeks as I pull him roughly to the front of my body, lips still moving hungrily over his mouth. I feel like I’m already on the edge, filthy noises coming out of my mouth when he pulls his shirt off, his white singlet plastered to his chest. Fuck he’s hot like this. 

“Ugh” he grunted, wrapping his arms around my neck, biting my shoulder as I struggled with my shirt buttons. After a second more it’s off, and I groan loudly, finally able to hold him to my chest. I can barely see through the blinding rain, but I can see enough to lay him gently on the ground, straddling his waist as he pushes his groin up. 

He groans loud and long as I peel his undies off, quickly divesting of my own before wrapping my hand around both our cocks, squeezing as I stroke, up and down, twisting slightly on the upstroke. He looks ridiculously hot like this, the rain running in rivulets down the planes of his body, his mouth open and his eyes closed. 

“Oh fuck, I’m not gonna last if you keep that up” he drawls, stilling my hand. I grin and shove two fingers in my mouth, sloppily coating them in spit before I grab his ass, circling his asshole. He lies back, spreading his legs and lifting his hips as I push past the tight ring of muscle, brushing past the little bump inside him that makes him jump. 

“Oh-huuuh” he moans, pushing down until two of my fingers disappear into his body. He fucks my fingers slowly, his eyes locked onto mine until he gives a long shudder. 

“Condom, in my pants pocket” he grunts, whimpering as I withdraw my fingers and reach for his pants, searching through the pockets till I find the little foil packet. 

“Gonna make you feel good baby” I said, rolling the condom on before moving back to him. He throws his legs over my shoulders, hooking his ankles behind my head as I lined up, pushing gently into his body. It’s hot, wet and tight, and oh so erotic, with the rain falling slower now, making it easier to see. 

“Oh Adam” he whined when I’m fully inside him. I reached down for his hands: gripping his fingers tight as I start to move, first gentle little thrusts, my rhythm growing as he responds, his eyes popping open when I hit his prostate. 

“Krissss” I hissed, panting into his open mouth, my movements stuttering as I felt him contract around my dick. He throws his head back, and I attack his neck, kiss-biting a path down the corded muscle, tasting rain- drops as I go. 

“I’m gonna come, gonna…oh ohhh” he groans, and I felt him shudder as hot cum painted my chest. He grabbed on tight as I snapped my hips, thrusting once, twice more before my balls drew up and I came, yelling into his shoulder. There are teeth marks in the tanned flesh when I drew back, but he doesn’t seem to care, resting his face in the crook of my neck, lips sucking softly at the skin. 

“You’re going to give ma a hickey”

I felt his lips harder against my skin, his tongue laving the spot repeatedly. 

“I like that, they’ll know I did this to you” he said softly, his arms tightening around my middle. Belatedly I realise I’m still inside him, but he clamps his legs around me when I try to move. 

“Stay there, just for a bit longer” he said, clenching around my dick. 

I hummed and kissed him softly, turning his head, chasing the little raindrops still falling on his skin. He let his head fall back, his mouth open as he catches the water there. The next time our lips meet, he passed some of the water to me, sharing it between our mouths. As I swallowed, I was struck by the intimacy of the act. 

“Come home with me” I whispered. 

It took a moment for him to respond, and I saw doubt swimming in his ochre eyes. But then his arms tightened around me. 

“Ok” he breathed, and I felt my heart fill to bursting at the trust in his gaze. 

“Really?”

He laughed, his eyes twinkling. “Yes really. I’ll come home with you”

“You’ll give your music another try?”

He nodded. “I will, as long as you’re beside me, I will”

“I’ll be there. I’ll help you get started”


	9. 9

When the rain finally let up we got back to work, falling into the routine that had now become familiar to me. Sure my muscles still ached, and I went to bed bone tired every night, but I felt like I was doing something for the good of the world, felt like I was a pretty good guy. Of course, having Kris beside me helped in that respect. 

Things were wrapping up for United Living too: Dave told me they’d be moving on to another place after the week was up. He said something about doing more relief work, but this time in Mexico, and that I was always welcome if I ever wanted to work with them again. 

The day before I had to go back to LA, Kris took me to the orphanage again so I could see the kids one last time. Leila ran right out to meet me, launching herself into my arms as soon as I got out of the car. 

“Looks like someone’s a fan” Kris chuckled, following me inside. 

“How are you today sweetie?” I asked her, settling her on my hip. That old paternal instinct kicked in again, and I wished there was some way I could do more for them. 

“I’m good, do you have any more songs for us?” she asked. 

“I do, do you have any for me to learn? I have to have something to show my friends back in America”

She nodded and soon the others had all joined us, Kris sat down as well, and the kids soon start to teach us a new song. Enoch has even prepared a little dance for us, it’s the sweetest thing I’ve ever seen, and I don’t want to leave them. 

We stay at the orphanage for about two hours before Kris had to drag me away. The whole thing is made even worse when Leila cries and begs me to stay. 

“I can’t honey, I really wish I could but I have to go home to see all my friends and get back to work”

“But why can’t you stay here with us?”

Right then I wanted nothing else. The look on her face just about broke my heart. 

“I can’t stay, but I’ll come back to visit, and I’ll send you letters too” I said, promising her the next best thing. 

“Will you?”

I nodded. “I will, I’m going to have your carer give me the address so I can write as soon as I get home”

“Ok” she said, but she still looked teary. Kris patted my shoulder gently, reminding me that we had to go. 

“Bye sweetie, bye guys” I said, my throat a bit tight as I set her down. Kris handed me a slip of paper with the address on it, and we headed back to the car. 

“Bye Adam” they chorused, waving as they watched the car head back down the road. 

I’m not embarrassed to say I was upset, there was such power in those little kids, they’d brought so much joy to my life, even while theirs was pretty ordinary. Kris gave my hand a squeeze as I wiped at my eyes, sniffing. 

“You ok?”

I nodded and blinked through the tears, bringing his hand to my lips. 

“Yeah, it’s just hard to say goodbye”

***

Thankfully there’s plenty of work to be done when we get back to the camp, which takes my mind off saying goodbye to the kids. After giving me a quick kiss, Kris is off to put up some more frames, but I decide to go and help Tanya with the paintwork on one of the already completed ones.

“Hey Adam” she said warmly, adjusting her hat. 

“Hey, want a hand?”

“Sure” she said, handing me a brush. The treatment we’re using to protect the wood stinks, but it’s easy work, and it allows my mind to wander. My plane ticket is already booked, and I have everything pretty much ready, including a fresh set of clothes, and my usual make-up, which I haven’t worn here at all. 

I thought about not wearing any on the plane, but then there’d probably be paps at the airport, and it would be just my luck to be captured not looking my best. That all seemed pretty petty now though, compared to everything I’ve seen here, the poverty, the crime: the love. Maybe I just wouldn’t go home at all. 

“Penny for your thoughts?” Tanya asked. 

I sighed. “Just thinking about going home”

She smiled knowingly. “It’s tough isn’t it? To go back to your life after everything you’ve seen here. I always struggle with it, but can I tell you something?”

“Of course”

She winked. “It gets easier, and I’m always more thankful for what I’ve got after doing something like this”

“Oh trust me, I’m never going to waste anything ever again” 

She grinned. “You know what I missed the most about home?”

“What?”

“A hot shower. Those basins we use now are ok, but it’s nothing compared to the hot water”

“I hear you on that” I chuckled, glancing over to where Kris was working.

“You guys are so cute”

I grinned. “Shut up”

Tanya slapped my shoulder. “You are! It’s nice to see Kris happy: he’s always so tense. I’m all for you guys being together”

“Thanks, I’m sure we’ll have our problems, but we’ll work it out”

“Hey!” Kris called, waving. 

“What?”

“What are you talking about? Are you talking about me?”

I laughed. “Talking about you, not to you”

Tanya laughed as Kris got back to his work, watching as he sawed a beam into a more workable size. I stared for a while too, watching the play of muscles under his white shirt, feeling my body’s instant reaction to him. 

Tanya cleared her throat, grinning. “He’s pretty hot, I’ll give you that. You may have just found a keeper”

I smiled. “I hope so”

***

My final night in Haiti isn’t really all that different from any of the others I’ve spent here. Dave does bring out a bottle of Tequila though, and we all proceeded to get a bit drunk, Kris I discover, is a silly drunk, he spent most of the night staring at me with a sappy lovesick expression.

I don’t drink all that much, but it was nice to feel the buzz tingling though my veins. Combine the alcohol with the oppressive heat though, and it’s not long before I’m yawning and ready for bed. My flight leaves at 10 the next morning, and I’ve got to be ready to go through Customs. 

“I might hit the hay you guys, I think this guy needs bed too,” I said, pulling Kris up. He swayed drunkenly, and giggled, clutching my arm. 

“I get to go to bed with Adam” 

I rolled my eyes. “Yes they know you do”

He grinned and I dragged him away before he could embarrass himself any further. Kris giggled the entire way, weaving drunkenly and stumbling along beside me till we finally reach our tent. 

“Kiss me” Kris demanded once I’d sat him down on the bunk. I laughed softly as I undid his shoes, smiling when I felt his fingers in my hair again. He liked to do that, it seemed. 

“Adam” he whined, tugging me closer till our lips met. He tasted like the Tequila we’d been drinking, a faint saltiness residing on his lips that I eagerly licked away. 

“You taste good,” he mumbled, fiddling with my trousers with fumbling hands. 

“You too” I said, pushing him down on the bunk. He pouted as I pulled away, but I could tell he was already succumbing to the alcohol in his system. His eyes closed as soon as he hit the pillow, and I was left to undress him and pull the mosquito net over his bed before clambering into my own.

***

I felt way too dressed up the next morning as Kris drove me to the airport in Port-au-Prince. I certainly feel different, it feels like ages since I wore makeup, and the eyeliner feels unusual. It had taken me a bit longer to apply it this morning, and I guessed I must be out of practise.

“Are you sure you want me to come back to LA with you?” Kris asked, his eyes on the road. Jerry was in the backseat, along with our luggage. 

“Yes. You don’t have to come back right away, I mean you’re not finished here till Thursday, and you have stuff to organise at home first, but I really want you to come. I wouldn’t ask you if I didn’t”

“I’m not sure how much time it’ll take to get things sorted with my folks”

I nodded. “I know, but you have my number, and someone will be there to collect you from LAX when you come in” I said, refusing to let myself doubt the fact that he would come. He would, hopefully. 

“And you’re sure it’s ok for me to stay at your place while I get settled?”

“Kris,” I said, grasping his hand, “It’s totally fine. I want to be with you”

He smiled. “I want to be with you too, it’s just a bit to take in. My parents aren’t going to be happy about my decision”

“But you are right?”

“Yes I am. I love my music: I just never really had the chance to properly pursue it”

“Good. Please try not to worry about everything, it’s all going to work out,” I said, staring out the window as we pulled up to the airport. Jerry collected my bags, and ignored me when I tried to take them off him. 

The airport was bustling as we made our way inside, Jerry shielding us from the worst of the crowd, Kris holding my hand as we checked my bags. I didn’t want to say goodbye to him yet, to any of them really. 

“So once I sort things out with my folks, I’ll text you the details of my flight”

“And I’ll have a driver come and pick you up, and bring you to my place”

Kris nodded, but still looked worried. It didn’t really make me feel any better, and I hated the fact that I was so torn up about this, but I really liked him, and wanted him to come home with me. I knew it was a lot to ask of someone, to pretty much give up their life and move to an unfamiliar city with some guy you hardly know. 

Once my luggage was checked, we made our way slowly to Customs, and the one -way gate that only Jerry and I would go through. Kris’s fingers tightened around mine, and I pulled him in for a hug, wrapping my arms around him tightly. 

“I’m gonna miss you” he murmured, his hands fisted in my shirt. 

“I’ll miss you too baby”

He pulled back just enough to kiss me, his lips hard against mine. There was something final in the kiss, something that was desperate, like he was trying to hold on to something he knew he couldn’t have. 

I just kissed him harder, my throat tight. He had tears in his eyes when we finally broke apart, and I gently traced his features, committing them to memory, even as I hoped I wouldn’t have to. 

“I’ll see you in a little bit” I managed, my voice only a little wobbly. 

He nodded. “Ok”

I kissed him once more before pulling away, trying to keep my face composed as I walked through the gate, Jerry beside me. I’d almost done it too, but like some character in a romance movie, I turned around for a final look, my face crumpling when I saw Kris standing alone, his hand raised in farewell.


	10. 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This final chapter is from Kris's POV. Just wanted to give you a taste of what's running through his mind. :)

Saying goodbye to Adam Lambert was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do. He had such a big personality that everywhere I went without him seemed emptier, less vital than when he’d been here. The camp was definitely quieter, and for once I was thankful that I was leaving the next day. 

I spent most of my remaining day in Haiti alone, thinking about what Adam had suggested I do. Moving to LA to pursue my music didn’t sound overly difficult, but in reality the road was plagued with pitfalls, and while Adam had assured me he would help out, I had to wonder if he would even have the time to help me, let alone continue our relationship. He’d said himself that he would be going straight back into planning his second world tour. 

The thought of being without him sent a bolt of pain through my chest, and I immediately threw away the idea. We would work it out, we had to, he was too special to lose. Never in a million years had I thought I’d fall in love with a celebrity, but I realised I had, or at least had the beginnings of it. It was a nice feeling, to know that he would wait for me, and I promised to myself to try not to let him down. 

But there was still so much to organise! I had to get my stuff from home, my clothes, guitars and other crap and haul my ass to LA, but that wasn’t even the half of it. First I had to face my parents, and I knew that wasn’t going to be pleasant. I wished I had Adam with me now, I was pretty sure nothing intimidated him.

***

My parent’s house in Little Rock didn’t look much different from when I’d left it 3 months ago. The polished wooden floor was still so shiny I could see my reflection in it, the grandfather clock was still ticking away in the living room, but other than that the house was quiet. Mom would likely be at her country club, spending time with her friends, while Dad would probably be at the office, working hard to make sure everything ran smoothly when I took over. Gulp.

After dumping my stuff in my room I spent far too long luxuriating in a warm shower, washing the residual sweat and grime off my body. It felt damn nice to finally feel clean, and I took a bit of time in front of the mirror checking out my hair and having a decent shave, getting rid of the fine chestnut whiskers on my jaw. 

Finally I was dressed and clean, and still had a few hours to rehearse what I was going to say to my parents. Adam had given me his number before we’d left, so I shot off a quick text, letting him know I got home safely. He didn’t answer right away, but that was ok, he was probably working. Speaking of, I had a few things to work on myself. 

To say my parents were shocked when I told them of my plans to move to LA was an understatement. Mom’s mouth fell open and her face paled, while Dad refused to believe anything I said. I wasn’t sure what to say about Adam, so I decided not to say anything for the moment. 

“What do you mean moving to LA?” Dad spluttered. 

“Exactly what I said. I’m moving to LA to pursue my music”

“How are you going to run our business if you’re in LA?”

I took a breath. “Dad I’m not taking over the business”

“I beg your pardon?”

“I’m not taking over the company. I’m going to be a musician, there are plenty of other people willing to run the company Dad, you won’t have trouble finding someone to take my place”

“But you’re the best for the job”

I shook my head. “I’m not Dad, honestly I don’t really know what the company does. How can someone like that be good?”

“It won’t take you long to get the hang of things, you’ve been visiting me in the office for years”

“I can’t do it Dad. It wouldn’t be fair to you, or to the employees. What about Patrick? He’s been after the top job for years now, and we both know he’d be perfect for it”

“What’s brought this on Kristopher?” Mom suddenly spoke up, breaking her silence. 

“I’ve sorted out my priorities, sort of like a realisation of what I want to do with my life. I’m going to be selfish for once in my life and do what I want,” I said, fiddling with the strap of my watch. 

“You’ve always wanted to be a part of Allen Enterprises though,” Dad said. 

I shook my head. “No Dad I haven’t, I was just too scared to tell you because it meant so much to you. I’m sorry”

Dad ran a hand through his thinning hair, and blew out a breath. I tensed, waiting for the explosion. He’d been remarkably calm about everything so far: it had to happen sooner or later. 

“You’re sure this is what you want to do? It’s not going to be easy for you”

“I know. It’s what I want”

“Then we’re behind you son, anything you need” Dad said, reaching over and clapping me on the back. My mouth fell open in shock. Where the hell was the tirade I was expecting?

“What?” he asked. 

“I’m a little shocked. I thought you’d be mad”

Dad chuckled wryly. “No, I’m still a little miffed to be honest, I don’t quite understand, but I’ll come around, your mother too. I can’t say I’m surprised though, I think there was always a part of me that knew you didn’t want to be in the company. You spent so much time away on your charity work, that I couldn't help but think you were stalling a little.”

“Really?”

“Yes. So you’re going to move to LA now are you?”

I nodded. “Yep, as soon as I can get my stuff together”

“Where are you going to stay? What about a job? Rent? Food?”

“I’ve got my accommodation organised already, you don’t need to worry about that. I’ll find a job once I’ve settled a bit. It’s going to be hard for a while, but I’ll manage”

“You’ll keep in touch won’t you?” Mom asked. 

“Of course I will, I’m only moving away Mom, I’m not cutting you out of my life forever. I want you to be a part of my life, I won’t cut you off”

Mom smiled. “Make sure you send us the address as soon as you get there”

“I will Mom, I promise. Thank you guys”

***

The first thing I notice about Los Angeles, is the weather: it’s much warmer than back home, humid too, but it’s a lot different from the Haitian heat. It’s kind of like a solid warmth that hits me as soon as I get off the plane. I’ve already sent my flight details to Adam, and he promised to have a driver there with my name – a made up one, which I think is pretty funny.

So I step off the plane at LAX, adjusting my sunglasses on my head and pulling my messenger bag higher up on my shoulder. This is easily the busiest airport I’ve ever been in, Port-au-Prince comes close, but they really are worlds apart. I’m jostled around as I followed the crowd to the baggage carousels, all the while keeping my eyes peeled for Adam’s man. He’d texted me the details: the guy was tall and large, with bleached blonde hair, so he shouldn’t be too hard to spot. 

But as I followed the crowd, I couldn’t see him. Everyone here seemed to be dressed stylishly, and more than once I found myself almost calling out to the random bleached blondes that pushed past me. Once I made it down to the baggage claim, I grabbed my two bags, pretty light really, considering it contained most of my clothes (the heavier stuff would come later), and found a spot against the wall where I could people watch. 

Finally I spotted him, a big tall guy holding a small white card with the name ‘Bernard McHale’ on it. I sighed softly at the made-up name Adam had organised, but ambled over, offering a smile and a wave. 

“You’re McHale?”

I nodded. “Yep, that’s err…me”

The other guy nodded briskly and picked up both my bags, easily lifting them as he marched outside – I almost had to jog to keep up with him. Jeez, this guy was fast. 

I didn’t pay all that much attention as he made his way through a small private parking lot to a shiny black SUV, that looked suspiciously like something out of CSI. He didn’t speak, didn’t offer any small talk but I didn’t really care. All I cared about, now that I was on the ground, in LA, was seeing Adam. 

My phone buzzed as we drove through the city, and I smiled as I glanced at the screen. 

_Where R U? – A_

I grinned, typing a response as the car continued up into the Hollywood Hills. Out of the corner of my eye I could see the famous sign, the white letters bright against the hill. 

_Package is secured – I feel like something from CSI – K_

I tapped my foot impatiently on the floor as we kept going, come on, come on. My phone beeped again. 

_Need I remind you that everyone entering my house must be frisked? – A_

I laughed and finally the car stopped at a large security gate, where my driver punched in a code, before the gate slowly opened, revealing a short drive and an absolutely huge house. 

“Holy” I muttered as the car finally pulled up outside. Adam’s house was pretty big for one guy. I wondered if he ever got lonely, but the thought was pushed from my mind when I saw the front door open, Adam framed for a moment by the elegant dark wood. 

I waved madly and grabbed the door handle, almost snapping it off in my haste to reach him. He jogged closer, his face stretched into a wide grin as I finally got the door opened. 

“I’m here!” I said breathlessly, practically melting into his solid chest as he wrapped his arms around me, spinning madly and lifting me off the ground. I loved his strength, that he could lift me easily and that I felt totally safe with him. God I’d missed him. 

“I missed you,” he breathed, as if echoing my own thoughts. I squeezed him harder, inhaling the scent of his skin, relishing finally being reunited.

“Missed you too”

I felt him grin where his face was buried in my neck, and ran a hand through his soft hair. It was shorter than when I’d last seen him. 

“You got a haircut?”

He grinned, his eyes creasing adorably. “I haven’t seen you for a week and this is the first thing you say to me?”

I laughed and pulled his head down. “No, come here”

His lips were soft and sweet, and he tasted faintly of mint and apple, and his own unique flavour that seemed to ease something inside me, something I hadn’t really known had been hurting till I was with him. 

“Come inside” he murmured huskily, lips pressing hot little kisses to my mouth in quick succession. I chuckled. 

“Really?”

He pulled back, eyes sparkling. “Not for that, there’ll be plenty of time for that later. Come and check it out”

I grinned and followed him inside, holding his arm close to me, as if I couldn’t get enough of him. Which was totally true, I couldn’t seem to get enough. The interior of the house was beautiful, the front room dominated by a cool looking driftwood dining table, a burning vanilla candle in the centre filling the room with delicious scent. The walls were dotted with unique artwork, and other little knick- knacks all tastefully arranged. It wasn’t cluttered or messy, but obviously lived in, there were a pair of black boots in the corner, a book on the table. It was just like him really, arty, eclectic and totally cool: there really wasn’t any other word for him. 

“Welcome to my humble abode” he said, drawing a sweeping gesture around the room. 

“Cool” I said, following him into the kitchen, a modern room with a dark marble counter, shiny silver accents and creamy cupboards. It was, just like the other room, very stylish and totally somewhere I could see myself. 

“Your room is upstairs,” he said, leading me up the stairs to a nicely sized room decorated in dark blues. The walls were cream with another painting against the main wall, a chest of drawers, a built in wardrobe, and a queen bed with a dark blue coverlet. 

Adam turned me to him, holding me again. 

“I told you before we left Haiti, that you could stay for as long as you wanted. I meant it. I want you to stay, this past week apart has really made me realise that I’m…I’m totally falling for you Kris”

Oh my God, how could he expect me to be coherent after declaring himself like that? I stood on tip -toe to kiss him gently, cradling his face with my hands. I saw fear and anxiety swimming in his eyes, and faintly hope. 

Gently I traced his eyebrows, the curve of his cheek, the Cupid’s bow that was his lips, all features I’d come to cherish. Now that I was with him again I realised just how much I’d missed him, everything seemed duller without him, but now everything sparkled, as if his very presence was enough to make things bright again 

“You don’t have to worry baby”, I whispered softly, kissing him again. 

He breathed out a sigh, smiling faintly. “You’ll stay?”

I nodded. “I’m staying right here. I’m home”


End file.
